Tuesday, November 13, 2012

OH SHIT


I WROTE SOMETHING ON MY BLOG!

Journalism Class Disrupted, Election Coverage Sabotaged by Overly Enthusiastic "Student"

By Keon Semsarha - rogue, louse, esquire
LOS ANGELES, California November 13, 2012
Serious Business
A Cal State LA journalism class providing supplementary election coverage for a popular USC politics blog was interrupted Tuesday, election day 2012, when a maniacal man claiming to be a graduate student had a slew of increasingly violent outbursts.

What started as a series of loudly uttered comments originating from the back of the classroom quickly escalated to full-on rabble-rousing and one instance of personal space being invaded, as the maniac's disproportionate level of excitement over the developing presidential election grew exponentially.

Showing no indication that he was aware of the class that was in session, the approximately 50 year old man eventually sprang to the front of the class and advanced his apparent agenda of molestation, forcing the busy students to acknowledge and awkwardly respond to his tantrums. "He wouldn't stop shouting at me. Like, right in my face. I tried to ignore him and focus on the election coverage we were supposed to be providing, but his spit kept getting in my mouth," the author assumes one student would say if he was asked to comment. "At one point he tried to ride me like a pony." Students shrank away in abject horror, or at least unequivocal disinterest, at the crazed man's ape-like shouts as they tried to focus on the task at hand.

"Artist's" "Rendition"
Receiving a reaction from the class that could be called tepid at best, he proceeded to offer the tired, irritated students a deal on pizza before running through the campus hallways assaulting busy professors as they tried to do their jobs.

The still-unnamed man has not been approached for comment because he's, like, totally super weird and creepy, but an "artist's" rendition can be seen to the right. One student in the class, the author of this article, has described the man as having "a much smaller chin" than in his own drawing. "His face is pretty much nothing like [the drawing]. Yeah, it's pretty much a completely different face. It doesn't look like that."

In fact, the maniacal, possibly axe-weilding man from the back of the classroom will not be approached, ever, due to an extreme level of caution on the part of the author, who says the man "scares the shit out of [him]. Not enough to stop [him] from writing this, but you know."

OH SHIT


I HAVEN'T WRITTEN ANYTHING ON THIS BLOG!